A quick note on Vietnamese bikers!
In Vietnam there are hardly any cars, maybe cos everyone is skint, but more probably because there are too many bikes and too drive you have to be more aggressive than jean claude van-damme on horse steroids. The cars honk their horns frantically demanding the bikes vacate the road, otherwise they’ll be vacating their skulls on the car’s bonnet. Car drivers are nobs, but I can see why! Bikes are mental, and they are everywhere, they carry people (upto 5 at a time), they carry goods (including amongst other things: the entire contents of a house, a tree, a steaming kitchen for the sale of tasty buns etc...) they are the HGV’s and the Land Rovers of Asia. Given this I think everyone giving the developing world some shit for polluting the environment should take a look how much CO2 they’re pumping out, because I’m pretty sure 4 people on a 100cc bike for the school run is a lot more economical (albeit a lot more dangerous) than a 5 litre beast of a 4 x 4.
I hearby propose that everyone in Cheshire should have their jeeps confiscated and replaced by Honda’s amazing 125cc cub and then they can chat shit about organic vegetables and whole wheat rice, free in the knowledge that they aren’t completely misinformed self righteous pricks!
Sorry, enough ranting; the point is that the people here LOVE bikes, there are Millions of them. People also HATE traffic regulations, for example, red lights mean go faster, no entry means cruise down here regardless and the left and right side of the road appear to both be fine for going whichever direction you want. Also – there are NO police, I haven’t seen a single police car or police man in the whole of Vietnam (except playing cards outside the palace in Hanoi!) Therefore, when I have hired my bike and ridden around the cities I must admit, it was scary, really frickin scary – however, as if by magic, it works! In England we have so many regulations, so many rules, so many police, speeding fines, cameras, traffic cones, and yes its safe – but its also BORING. Here everyone’s bike is so slow and old and weak that they can’t crash – everything trundles along at 5 miles an hour and if anything hits anything else they just fall over and get up!
This is the way to do it, if you are reading this Cameron – take heed of my words!
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